Complex relationship - friendship versus love  

Posted by Divya A L

This is the most discussed/sought after topic for which i wanted to post my thoughts and ideas since long. Looks like finally its time that i do it. My thoughts are partly based on real life experiences.

Well, lets first discuss friendship. Whats it? Why do people become friends? On what aspects does one choose his/her friend. Basically, you would choose to be someone's friend if :
a> You are comfortable and at ease speaking to that person
b> Both of you are like-minded people
c> you share Common interests.
d> you like them for whatsoever XYZ reasons, it may be their character, social behavior, etc.
e> Most often than not, its just the fact that, everyone likes to be liked. So, if someone likes you for something, you'd appreciate and acknowledge it through friendship.

Well, we all surely have many categories of friends like "pen pals", "just friends", "good friends", "close friends", "best friends" so on and so forth. Sometime we even promote or demote(rarely) them within these categories. ;) Spending quality time with him/her brings them together and takes them another step ahead to become "close friends". One search in google with a keyword "friendship", will throw out numerous friendship quotes. Most of them are really touching and comply almost perfectly to what "friendship" means.

The next Big Question!! How different or sophisticated it becomes when two people of opposite sex tend to become the "best friends"?? If i were to answer this question, i would say, it shouldn't be any different from the way it would have been if they were of the same sex. But to my surprise, i have noticed in many cases, the idea of "love" creeps in from don't know where, especially from the guy's side. Well, i don't mean offence to the guys here, but 90% of the cases that i've come across, the guys tend to "assume" that the girl is interested in him in ways more than mere "friendship". Its also the case that many a times, the "friendship" is finally transformed into "love" when both are interested in each other in special ways. So i cant falsify the guys completely here.

Well, what if one's interested and the other is not. Should the one who's interested control his/her feelings for the other, or should the one uninterested, demote their level of friendship and call it quits? I'd rather put them in a seperate category and call it "Complex relationship" :P Either way, either of them will be hurt. Who's to be blamed? Is it one who brought in the concept of "love" or the other who is not ready to accept his/her love? Without either of their faults, why should they suffer? If they call it quits, isn't it contrasting the basic definition of a friend? Should it cost their long term friendship so dearly?? People who like each other so much that they are "best friends" will now be ready to leave each other just because one of them "loved" the other? And many a time, "love" is considered far superior to friendship, and that very love, transforms them into two different strangers, only if one of them is interested. Is this all justifiable?

Talking about love... I'd say its very different from friendship. One has special feelings for the person with whom they are in love with. Can it bloom out of friendship? Well, yes, it very much can but need not be always. Sometimes, things just cant change or rather change overnight. For instance, if two people have known each other for very long like say tens of years, then all of a sudden their friendship cannot turn into love easily. The simple reason being, one simply cannot change their feelings overnight for the other.

Never mix friendship and love. Both are unique and special in their own ways. They have their own place and if you happen to mix the both, its gonna cost you dearly. Think 100 times before you get into what i termed as "complex relationship". Atleast try to know if the other is interested or not before proceeding in that direction. Or just give it some time.

Love usually happens at first sight
Though most find it rarely right
Friendship lasts a lifetime
Which only grows over time!!

Both are true and precious in their own ways
However in a coin, they are two different faces
Friendship can end in love at times
But love in friendship, can never happen in your lifetime!!

True love never fails;
Honest friendship never breaks!!

:) :) :)  

Posted by Divya A L

Its sulekha again... One of my poems titled - "Solitude - bliss or blues?" is being listed as the "featured poems" in sulekha for this month. Don't know how much use it will be to me or to others, but definitely feeling good about it!! :)


A disturbed mind  

Posted by Divya A L in

The swarthy look on his face
Arms working in a quick pace
Hitting hard against the nail
The target never seems to fail

The beast on the other side
Roaring ferociously, everywhere he glides
The prey tightly pressed in its paws
The bloodpool grew as he pierced the flesh in his claws

In the other corner i hear the cries of a child
Being lost in streets, the cries turned wild
From far across, mom saw its plight,
Ran into a speeding car, people witnessed a horrific sight

The sounds of bloodhounds
Filled up the air, intense and profound
The burgler had escaped,
While the barks never ceased

All these happening at one single place
Hard to believe, difficult to face
Solace and comfort i try to seek and find
But their sounds echo, makes my mind - numb and blind!!

PS: Suffering severe/acute headache since the past few weeks.